I ♥ ----> him ---> A LOT :')
Today, technically its yesterday actually, is one's of my sad day. for once, i thought i have lost him. i'm so afraid.. here's the story....
Kitorang ada salah faham sikit n gaduh. In message, actually. aku tak nak angkat call dia. i just reply his msg only. I argue with him about our relationship n bla bla bla. suddenly dia msg " awak nak kawin ngan sy?". in my mind I say " what? biar betul dia ni". then i just reply "huh?". after a few minutes, he reply "I just got hit by a car. Just now. I otw to the clinic". I ask him "is it serious?". then he reply, "Idk, i can't feel my leg". that time, i'm so afraid like i'm gonna lose him. n i'm start to worry. ALLAH jelah yg tau prasaan aku masa tu. i ask him, "can i hear your voice?". he reply," I'll call u 10 minutes from now. i'm at the clinic. my head is bleeding". I'm just, ok then. I'll wait for u.
after 10 minutes, he call me, but.. the sad moments begin. he call me like he call a stranger. he do knew me but he not remember. he tried to recall everything b4 the accident. he even ask me who are his parent. i feel like want to cry n i actually did cry. he told me he feel thirsty n bought a mineral water. he paid with RM50 n did not take the change. he also ask me where is he n ect. i really don't know what the best answer i should give him. pipi memang dah basah abih la. dah la selsema + dgn hujan air mata pulak.. memang sedut² hingus laa. yg lagi sad, i'm the one who give him his parents number 'cause he doesn't remember. rasanya hentakan masa dia kena langgar tu kuat kot sampai hilang sikit memori dia. STM=short-term memory lost, maybe. I don't know. masa tgh call tu aku dah rasa mcm cerita THE VOW dah, the wife with the memory lost after a car accident.
masa ni barulah aku rasa dan hargai betapa pentingnya dia dlm hidup aku sampai aku tak sanggup kehilangan dia. n masa ni jugaklah baru aku sedar betapa aku sayangkan dirinya sehingga tak terkata dan tak dapat aku gambarkan. All I just hope is he safe. aku dah sebak bila dia cuba nak ingat sapa aku sebenarnya. i'm so afraid if he does not remember me at all. i'm not really sure dia betul² dah ingat aku ke tidak but, apa yg dia ckp kat aku bila aku tanya dia siapa aku, adalah apa yg aku msg pada dia sebelum accident. aku betul² sedih + sebak kalau betul apa yg dia bagi tau tu sebab dia baca dr msg, bukan betul² memori dia...
YA ALLAH, KAU PELIHARALAH INSAN BERNAMA MUHAMMAD FATHUR RAHMAN BIN ABDUL LIM. KEMBALIKANLAH APA YANG DIA LUPA JIKA DIA BENAR-BENAR LUPA. HANYA KEPADA-MU AKU BERDOA DAN MEMOHON PERTOLONGAN. AMIN...
moral: kalau anda sayangkan seseorang, hargai lah dia sebelum terlambat. bagi aku, mungkin ini adalah peluang kedua buat diriku untuk aku lebih menghargai dirinya. selama ni apa yang aku tau cuma buli dan sakitkan hati dia je.. :(
þö†-þê† þåÐå ◕‿◕
3:31 AM. =þ
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